Introduction
Everything this book says boils down to “Live in the Present”.
We have heard this advice counts times and this point this is a quote I brush of as cliche and turn toward counts the countless other “Productivity Gurus” to learn about the latest hacks, tips and tricks to maximise my output. All you get is one life right? So what wrong in tring to get everything in that life?
Seems like I was wrong and this book opened me upto a new way of thinking. Plus the author is an ex-productivity nerd like me so we really connected đ
Notes
Intro: In the Long Run, Weâre All Dead
- weâve been granted the mental capacities to make almost infinitely ambitious plans, yet practically no time at all to put them into action.
- Itâs somehow vastly more aggravating to wait two minutes for the microwave than two hours for the ovenâor ten seconds for a slow-loading web page versus three days to receive the same information by mail.
- Note: technology, which is aimed to bring us more time is accelerating our sense of time
- for almost the whole of history, the entire point of being rich was not having to work so much
Part I: Choosing to Choose
1.The Limit-Embracing Life
- We recoil from the notion that this is itâthat this life, with all its flaws and inescapable vulnerabilities, its extreme brevity, and our limited influence over how it unfolds, is the only one weâll get a shot at. Instead, we mentally fight against the way things areâso that, in the words of the psychotherapist Bruce Tift, âwe donât have to consciously participate in what itâs like to feel claustrophobic, imprisoned, powerless, and constrained by reality.â
- the more you confront the facts of finitude insteadâand work with them, rather than against themâthe more productive, meaningful, and joyful life becomes.
- a limit-embracing attitude to time means organizing your days with the understanding that you definitely wonât have time for everything you want to do
- This confrontation with limitation also reveals the truth that freedom, sometimes, is to be found not in achieving greater sovereignty over your own schedule but in allowing yourself to be constrained by the rhythms of communityâparticipating in forms of social life where you donât get to decide exactly what you do or when you do it.
- There is an alternative: the unfashionable but powerful notion of letting time use you, approaching life not as an opportunity to implement your predetermined plans for success but as a matter of responding to the needs of your place and your moment in history.
2.The Efficiency Trap
- itâs the definition of âwhat needs doingâ that expands to fill the time available.
- Note: perhaps we should start thinking about the time available to allocate instead of the tasks to be done
- Rendering yourself more efficientâeither by implementing various productivity techniques or by driving yourself harderâwonât generally result in the feeling of having âenough time,â because, all else being equal, the demands will increase to offset any benefits
- Far from getting things done, youâll be creating new things to do.
- the only route to psychological freedom is to let go of the limit-denying fantasy of getting it all done and instead to focus on doing a few things that count.
- The technologies we use to try to âget on top of everythingâ always fail us, in the end, because they increase the size of the âeverythingâ of which weâre trying to get on top.
3.Facing Finitude
- Our limited time isnât just one among various things we have to cope with; rather, itâs the thing that defines us, as humans, before we start coping with anything at all.
- Everything Is Borrowed Time
- Note: 4k weeks is better than 0 weeks period. This is an opertunity to practice gratitude. Everyday be thankful of the fact that you get to wake up and embrace this day.
- So maybe itâs not that youâve been cheated out of an unlimited supply of time; maybe itâs almost incomprehensibly miraculous to have been granted any time at all.
- Being alive is just happenstance, and not one more day of it is guaranteed.
- Note: this is why being grateful every morning is important
- The exhilaration that sometimes arises when you grasp this truth about finitude has been called the âjoy of missing out,â by way of a deliberate contrast with the idea of the âfear of missing out.â
4.Becoming a Better Procrastinator
- the point isnât to eradicate procrastination, but to choose more wisely what youâre going to procrastinate on, in order to focus on what matters most
- The real measure of any time management technique is whether or not it helps you neglect the right things.
- Principle number one is to pay yourself first when it comes to time.
- After years of trying and failing to make time for her illustration work, by taming her to-do list and shuffling her schedule, Abel saw that her only viable option was to claim time insteadâto just start drawing, for an hour or two, every day, and to accept the consequences, even if those included neglecting other activities she sincerely valued.
- The second principle is to limit your work in progress.
- The third principle is to resist the allure of middling priorities.
- Loss is a given. That ship has sailedâand what a relief.
The Inevitability of Settling
- we tend to contrast a life of settling with a life of what he labels âstriving,â or living life to the fullest. But this is a mistake,
- because living life to the fullest requires settling.
- âYou must settle, in a relatively enduring way, upon something that will be the object of your striving, in order for that striving to count as striving,â he writes: you canât become an ultrasuccessful lawyer or artist or politician without first âsettlingâ on law, or art, or politics, and therefore deciding to forgo the potential rewards of other careers. If you flit between them all, youâll succeed in none of them. Likewise, thereâs no possibility of a romantic relationship being truly fulfilling unless youâre willing, at least for a while, to settle for that specific relationship, with all its imperfectionsâwhich means spurning the seductive lure of an infinite number of superior imaginary alternatives.
- Note: writes godin
- joy of missing out
- renunciation of alternatives is what makes their choice a meaningful one in the first place.
5.The Watermelon Problem
- That problem is distraction
- After all, it hardly matters how committed you are to making the best use of your limited time if, day after day, your attention gets wrenched away by things on which you never wanted to focus
6.The Intimate Interrupter
- clearer it became to him that the real problem had been not the activity itself but his internal resistance to experiencing it. When he stopped trying to block out those sensations and attended to them instead, the discomfort would evaporate.
- The overarching point is that what we think of as âdistractionsâ arenât the ultimate cause of our being distracted. Theyâre just the places we go to seek relief from the discomfort of confronting limitation.
- Yet thereâs a sense in which accepting this lack of any solution is the solution.
- Some Zen Buddhists hold that the entirety of human suffering can be boiled down to this effort to resist paying full attention to the way things are going, because we wish they were going differently
- And the paradoxical reward for accepting realityâs constraints is that they no longer feel so constraining.
Part II: Beyond Control
7.We Never Really Have Time
- As the writer David Cain points out, we never have time in the same sense that we have the cash in our wallets or the shoes on our feet. When we claim that we have time, what we really mean is that we expect it. âWe assume we have three hours or three days to do something,â Cain writes, âbut it never actually comes into our possession.â
- So itâs a constant source of anxiety and agitation, because our expectations are forever running up against the stubborn reality that time isnât in our possession and canât be brought under our control.
- Our efforts to influence the future arenât the problem. The problemâthe source of all the anxietyâis the need that we feel, from our vantage point here in the present moment, to be able to know that those efforts will prove successful.
- Then Krishnamurti âsaid in a soft, almost shy voice, âYou see, I donât mind what happens.âââ (when asked about his secret for happiness)
- But all a plan isâall it could ever possibly beâis a present-moment statement of intent. Itâs an expression of your current thoughts about how youâd ideally like to deploy your modest influence over the future. The future, of course, is under no obligation to comply
8.You Are Here
- the more you focus on using time well, the more each day begins to feel like something you have to get through, en route to some calmer, better, more fulfilling point in the future, which never actually arrives.
- canât be the case that concerns for the future must always automatically take precedence
- By trying too hard to make the most of his time, he misses his life
- For all its chilled-out associations, the attempt to be here now is therefore still another instrumentalist attempt to use the present moment purely as a means to an end, in an effort to feel in control of your unfolding time.
- Radically Condensed Instructions for Being Just as You Are, âWe cannot get anything out of life. There is no outside where we could take this thing to. There is no little pocket, situated outside of life, [to which we could] steal lifeâs provisions and squirrel them away. The life of this moment has no outside.â
- Living more fully in the present may be simply a matter of finally realizing that you never had any other option but to be here now.
9.Rediscovering Rest (imp)
- De Graaf had put his finger on one of the sneakier problems with treating time solely as something to be used as well as possible, which is that we start to experience pressure to use our leisure time productively, too.
- The Latin word for business, negotium, translates literally as ânot-leisure,â reflecting the view that work was a deviation from the highest human calling.
- Note: when u think about it, its true leasure is our highest calling, which everyone is striving towards
- while all that recreation might have been fun, it wasnât exactly optional. People faced strong social pressure not to work all the time
- Note: this is for olden days and we are facing the opp
- It becomes difficult to enjoy a moment of rest for itself alone, without regard for any potential future benefits, because rest that has no instrumental value feels wasteful.
- The truth, then, is that spending at least some of your leisure time âwastefully,â focused solely on the pleasure of the experience, is the only way not to waste itâto be truly at leisure
- You need ways to make it likely that rest will actually happen.
- We might seek to incorporate into our daily lives more things we do for their own sake aloneâto spend some of our time, that is, on activities in which the only thing weâre trying to get from them is the doing itself
10.The Impatience Spiral
- the wise man (the reader is constantly being informed) is like a tree that bends instead of breaking in the wind, or water that flows around obstacles in its path
- Itâs not so much that weâre too busy, or too distractible, but that weâre unwilling to accept the truth that reading is the sort of activity that largely operates according to its own schedule.
- The high achievers of Silicon Valley reminded Brown of herself in her days as an alcoholic.
- Note: they are using achievement and the endless todolist as a distraction
- alcoholism is fundamentally a result of attempting to exert a level of control over your emotions that you canât ever attain.
- As the world gets faster and faster, we come to believe that our happiness, or our financial survival, depends on our being able to work and move and make things happen at superhuman speed. We grow anxious about not keeping upâso to quell the anxiety, to try to achieve the feeling that our lives are under control, we move faster. But this only generates an addictive spiral. We push ourselves harder to get rid of anxiety, but the result is actually more anxiety, because the faster we go, the clearer it becomes that weâll never succeed in getting ourselves or the rest of the world to move as fast as we feel is necessary. (Meanwhile, we suffer the other effects of moving too fast: poor work output, a worse diet, damaged
- that you canât truly hope to beat alcohol until you give up all hope of beating alcohol.
- When you finally face the truth that you canât dictate how fast things go, you stop trying to outrun your anxiety, and your anxiety is transformed.
11.Staying on the Bus
- But as society accelerates, something shifts. In more and more contexts, patience becomes a form of power.
- Peckâs insight hereâthat if youâre willing to endure the discomfort of not knowing, a solution will often present itself
- because thereâs less uncertainty in just calling things off than in waiting to see how they might develop.
- Three Principles of Patience
- The first is to develop a taste for having problems
- The second principle is to embrace radical incrementalism.
- âStay on the bus. Stay on the fucking bus.â
- Note: this is the advice given to photograph students who learn a sub field for 3 years. Its takes more time to make that field your own
12.The Loneliness of the Digital Nomad
- Yet the truth is that time is also a ânetwork good,â one that derives its value from how many other people have access to it, too, and how well their portion is coordinated with yours.
- every gain in personal temporal freedom entails a corresponding loss in how easy it is to coordinate your time with other peopleâs
- Or to put things slightly differently, the more Swedes who were off work simultaneously, the happier people got
- Note: this showed that its not just about the vacation, its also about the people u join u too
13.Cosmic Insignificance Therapy
- implausible, for almost all people, to demand of themselves that they be a Michelangelo, a Mozart, or an EinsteinâŚThere have only been a few dozen such people in the entire history of humanity
- Cosmic insignificance therapy is an invitation to face the truth about your irrelevance in the grand scheme of things
- In fact, it entails precisely the opposite: refusing to hold them to an abstract and overdemanding standard of remarkableness, against which they can only ever be found wanting, and taking them instead on their own terms, dropping back down from godlike fantasies of cosmic significance into the experience of life as it concretely, finitelyâand often enough, marvelouslyâreally is.
14.The Human Disease
- But the deeper truth behind all this is to be found in Heideggerâs mysterious suggestion that we donât get or have time at allâthat instead we are time.
- The peace of mind on offer here is of a higher order: it lies in the recognition that being unable to escape from the problems of finitude is not, in itself, a problem.
- His sole advice for walking such a path was to âquietly do the next and most necessary thing.
- But really, the ânext and most necessary thingâ is all that any of us can ever aspire to do in any moment.
- But in reality, itâs a curse. To hope for a given outcome is to place your faith in something outside yourself, and outside the current moment
Five Questions
- Where in your life or your work are you currently pursuing comfort, when whatâs called for is a little discomfort?
- James Hollis recommends asking of every significant decision in life: âDoes this choice diminish me, or enlarge me?â
- Are you holding yourself to, and judging yourself by, standards of productivity or performance that are impossible to meet?
- In what ways have you yet to accept the fact that you are who you are, not the person you think you ought to be?
- In which areas of life are you still holding back until you feel like you know what youâre doing?
- How would you spend your days differently if you didnât care so much about seeing your actions reach fruition?
Ten Tools for Embracing Your Finitude
- Adopt a âfixed volumeâ approach to productivity. A complementary strategy is to establish predetermined time boundaries for your daily work. keep two to-do lists, one âopenâ and one âclosed.â
- Serialize, serialize, serialize.
- Decide in advance what to fail at. Youâll inevitably end up underachieving at something, simply because your time and energy are finite. But the great benefit of strategic underachievement. But even in these essential domains, thereâs scope to fail on a cyclical basis
- Focus on what youâve already completed, not just on whatâs left to complete.
- Consolidate your caring. Social media is a giant machine for getting you to spend your time caring about the wrong things (this page), but for the same reason, itâs also a machine for getting you to care about too many things, even if theyâre each indisputably worthwhile.
- Embrace boring and single-purpose technology.
- Seek out novelty in the mundane.
- Be a âresearcherâ in relationships.
- Cultivate instantaneous generosity.
- Practice doing nothing.